For some reason The Coen Brothers are still split up, so here’s another attempt for Ethan with Honey Don’t!

I’ve got to get the most important part of this movie out of the way first. HOLY $!&# is this movie sexual. I just watched Basic Instinct hours before seeing this and I never thought I would see something comparable again, especially from some of the people involved. If it works or not is besides the point, because it sort of comes out of nowhere. Well, maybe not if you watched Ethan’s last film in Drive Away Dolls. He’s really turned down a different path and has chosen to tell stories about a certain demographic and basically created a Basic Instinct for lesbians.

Let’s start with the characters. Like most aspects of this movie, not everything is consistent. Whether it’s Aubrey Plaza barely being in the movie and then giving one of the worst over acting performances of the year to end it, or Charlie Day playing Charlie from Always Sunny for the entire film (he starts to work towards the end). At least we have the persistence of Margaret Qualley. Her wardrobe is on point, her acting is solid, and she means business. I don’t think we had really seen a woman in a PI role before so it was a very welcome switch up, where her writing was the most on target. How can I not mention Chris Evans as a sexual deviant and priest cult leader? He didn’t take a step back from freaky roles after playing Captain America, and I’m totally here for it, even if this role doesn’t fully flesh out in the most satisfying of ways.

The Coens are usually pretty great at creating a story and atmosphere for their movies, Ethan is halfway there. The opening title sequence from him is brutally unwatchable and honestly felt like something from a first year film student. Even having two scenes before that title sequence felt the least useful. I don’t think the writing has been as smart as they think it is since the split either. The story was overstuffed with interweaving plots that almost never connect. At points things just happen where the hints were either never given or so hidden that it felt like I was being laughed at for missing them.

This is a raunchy movie that is actually quite funny, and most of the time it’s not even the four or five main players making you laugh. I enjoyed the gratuitous violence and the sexual nature of a detective film, but the puzzle with no edges, harsh ending, and wavering acting outweighed my enjoyment of the characters and humor unfortunately.

I really wish the Coens would get back together. We miss you.

5.5/10